Thursday, December 21, 2006

Christmas Baking Marathon

Last night I had my friend, Jackie in for our annual baking marathon. Ok, its my baking marathon but Jackie comes along for the ride. I must say we were especailly good this year. We made peanut butter balls, marshmellow treats, melting moments cookies and peanut butter fudge in about 2 1/2 hours! I was really impressed! So that, plus the few treats I've bought for Christmas and I think we're ready to go from the baking end of things!

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

A Full Heart

December 19, 2006

Last night after work Chad & I went over to the Billington’s for Autumn’s birthday supper. She turned the big 2-0! I know Chad found it hard to believe his little sister was all grown up. Sharon, as usual, put on a massive spread of food! Gosh, I haven’t felt that full in ages. Meatballs, mashed potatoes, carrots, corn, brown rolls….and then Marble cake with gooey chocolate icing and way too much ice-cream! I then we wondered why we had to lay on the floor and moan discomfort!

Savanna, of course is a riot! What a hoot! The extra sugar from the chocolate and ice-cream probably didn’t help! Autumn got this cool Winnie the Pooh and friends dancing thing that played Christmas songs and Savanna loved it. She would dance, bending her knees a tiny bit, but she’s a head banger! She would just stand there, bopping her head like a cool dude. I thought I was going to cry laughing at her! Over and over again she’d say Momma, Nanna, Poppa, Doug and Kad (for Chad), of course also Ned and Mudd (her imaginary friends we think) and I don’t remember the other guys name, and then toward the end of the night she just pointed at me and said Heidi! I couldn’t believe it! I have a harder name to say so I didn’t expect her to get it for a while, but it was clear as day and totally made my birthday week! She’s such a doll! And has the most adorable smile!

Autumn opened her birthday gifts (with the big and potentially embarrassing Christmas present on the way at Christmas) and then I got to open my gifts! Autumn and Savanna gave me these adorable gingerbread men that bob—how I love gingerbread men! And Sharon and Gary gave me a box of mint chocolates (oh yum---goodbye waist goodbye) and the cutest wooden snowman head with a tree cut out in the hat and a light inside. It sounds weird but it is so great and sits in my window at home—I love him! But more than anything I love the card Autumn gave me. When I read it I didn’t know what to think, I was stunned, trying not to cry. It was so beautiful and I will treasure it forever. It said that she thought of me often and was so happy I was part of the family. Honestly I have found it hard coming into a new family and wondering at times if they would just prefer I hadn’t taken Chad away from them, I know the change hasn’t been easy on them either. It meant so much to me to know that she likes me, I hope over time to develop a better relationship. My cherished gift this year, is that card.

So in tummy agony, but full heart we went home for the night and I hit the sack early so that I would feel more rested for work today, than yesterday. The birthday week continues.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Birthday WEEK!

The Birthday Week has arrived! Saturday night I had plans to go out for dinner with Betty Anne, Shelley and Amy—girls night. It was fun! We went to Jungle Jims in Oromocto, where the boil order is still in play so we all bought JUMBO pop—YIKES! The food was really late coming so we just kept drinking and drinking and drinking. I had no idea how much I had downed until the end of dinner when I looked up and realized I’d had at least 2 ½ Jumbo Diet Pepsi. No wonder my back teeth were floating (as my Mom would say).

Then we came back to my place for coffee and chat and the girls surprised me with birthday gifts and Dairy Queen Birthday cake! How nice! Betty Anne informs me that when you get older you no longer have birthDAY but birthday WEEK. This sounds good to me! I don’t mind being spoiled at all! FUN!

I’m actually really excited about turning 27. I’ve always thought that my 27th year was going to be filled with good things. So bring it on!

Saturday, December 16, 2006

These are a few of my favorite things!

1. Eggnog or Hot Chocolate? Both! But Eggnog just at Christmas, with a little nutmeg on top, sitting in the living room (in front of the fire if we had one) with all the lights off but the tree and candles—listen to the beauty of the Christmas Tree sing!

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Oh! He’s GOT to wrap them! Absolutely necessary! Because you don’t see Santa’s gifts until the morning when you wake up the suspense is just crazy, wondering what can possibly be in that box!

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? Absolutely coloured, although ironically enough we have white lights on our deck and little birch tree this year. But that’s just because that is all Marden’s had on sale. (You should have bought it when you saw it at Mardens!) Eventually when we’re rolling in doe it will be coloured for sure! But absolutely coloured on the tree, no give or take there.

4. Do you hang mistletoe? I've always wanted to. Mom & Dad had a plastic mistletoe they would hang at Christmas when I was a kid, not that it made much of a difference then, but Id like to have some now. Fun!

5. When do you put your decorations up? When we can find some time! But I do have a rule, no Christmas music or decorations until after Remembrance Day. Usually we get our tree around the second weekend of December and decorate then.

6 What is your favourite holiday dish (excluding dessert)? This is a tricky one, I love so many different holiday foods! Excluding dessert helps. I love dressing (the way my Mom does it) and the turkey, but probably one of my favourites is the hot turkey sandwiches with French fries that we make with the leftovers, the day after….yum yum….oh the gravy….and pees….

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child: Christmas Eve Mom would be putting together a huge spread of treats, appetizers etc. and we would have run around all day dropping off everyone’s gifts. Us girls would often watch a Christmas Special on while Mom got ready and then Dad would put a fire in the fireplace and we would all play our instruments, even Mom would play, and Mom would read the Christmas story. It was a time we were all together, just quiet and not running with the regular business, and just enjoying each other. Eventually we would hang our socks and go to bed and I remember whispering with my sisters across the hall, trying to fall asleep before Santa came. This was such a special time when my family would just stop and hit pause on life and enjoy each other.

8. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? No. Christmas Eve was always about focusing on Jesus’ birth and sacred more quiet family time. We saved the Christmas gifts for Christmas Day and I can’t imagine doing it any other way.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree? Usually the evening after we get our Christmas tree and the branches have fallen Chad puts up the lights, thank goodness I hate that job! And then we take all of our ornaments, some we made as children, others we collected along the way, and some we’ve gotten together and hang them. Then I put on the ribbon after, loving the effect and doing my best not to curse the process! Then we sit around after and enjoy the lights and maybe some holiday eggnog and Christmas music.

11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? Love it and I so desperately want a sleigh ride this year! I can’t imagine Christmas without snow, but it’s not looking good this year. I do get really really sick of snow come February, but generally I love it and count it a necessity at Christmastime.

12. Do you remember your favorite gift? I think every year of my life I’ve had a favourite gift. My Mom always tells the story about the year when I was really little and as she put me to bed Christmas Eve she asked what it was I wanted from Santa, and out of the blue, completely different then what I had said all year long, I said I wanted Lego. She nearly died! All the stores were closed, everything was shut down and Santa had not bought me any Lego! Dad assured her I would be thrilled with all of my Christmas gifts in the morning and forget all about it. But Christmas morning came and I was visibly upset I had not received any Lego. Near the very end of all the gift giving I opened a present from my Aunt that had a tiny package of Lego in with it and I was thrilled! I had my lego! Then I remember the year I got my stereo, yes stereo! And my typewriter, I was going to be novelist, and so many others! Last year one of my favourites was a bunch of stones my sister had painted and decorated for every season for when I have my own classroom.

13. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Taking a bit of time to reflect on the significance of Jesus coming to earth to offer every human regardless of stature, culture, race or gender true hope and life. And spending some “quality” time with family and friends, and having the opportunity to express my love for them in a more tangible way than I might during the year.

14. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? Peanut Butter Balls. Since I was a kid they were my favortie! Mom hated rolling them out so since we were really little my sisters and I would always roll them for her and she would dip them. Of course we ate nearly a third of what we rolled but it was so much fun! I like them when they’ve just come out of the freezer and they’ve thawed but not so much that they are gooey sweet! I also love them the way my Mom makes them of course! With ricecrispies!

15. What is your favorite holiday tradition? Same as my favourite Christmas memory as a child. (Christmas Eve Mom would be putting together a huge spread of treats, appetizers etc. and we would have run around all day dropping off everyone’s gifts. Us girls would often watch a Christmas Special on while Mom got ready and then Dad would put a fire in the fireplace and we would all play our instruments, even Mom would play, and Mom would read the Christmas story. It was a time we were all together, just quiet and not running with the regular business, and just enjoying each other. Eventually we would hang our socks and go to bed and I remember whispering with my sisters across the hall, trying to fall asleep before Santa came. This was such a special time when my family would just stop and hit pause on life and enjoy each other.)

16. What tops your tree? Nothing right now, but I remember the year that my Mom and I spent over an hour sitting on the floor at K-Mart going through all the beautiful Angel tree tops and finding the one that had the most perfect face. I’m looking for something similar for our tree and until I find it I will settle for nothing less!

17. Which do you prefer giving or Receiving? Absolutely giving! (Not that I don't like getting presents too) How much fun it is to think of a gift you think your loved one will love or enjoy and then wait for them to open it. This is the hardest part for me! If I think I’ve found something they love I want them to have it right away! I guess the anticipation for me about their gifts is greater than about my own gifts a lot of the time!

18. What is your favorite Christmas Song? O Holy Night and The little Drummer Boy

19. Candy Canes! Yuck or Yum? Yum! I don’t get super crazy excited about them or anything, but after a meal, or dinner out or something I do enjoy sucking on a peppermint one for awhile. Kinda nice. And I love Candy Cane ice cream! Yum yum!

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

The Pressure Cooker heats up again

I had an interesting and passing conversation with a dear friend this afternoon. I was commenting on the recent news that I’ve been handing out dirty looks lately. I was telling her how I was surprised, that I used to be known for my smile, not my scowl, and then she said something surprising. She said I didn’t smile anymore. Unfortunately I didn’t get to “unpack that” (as Dr. Phil would say) with her, but had to run off.

Wow, what a lot to think about. One of my dear and trusted friends thinks I don’t smile anymore. I did have time to mention that is has been a really difficult year for me, but this came with more interesting comments, left unpacked, about the importance of choosing to smile and be happy regardless of how I feel, as that is ministry to people and what they need. I got thinking about this, a lot tonight. Of course, the tears are falling too, because I’m a sensitive shmuck.

Is that what I want to be about? Maybe that is what being married to a Pastor has been about for years, but I’m not sure I’m game for that being what I’m about. Don’t get me wrong I don’t want to harm my husband’s ministry…but is it not alright for me to show up to church as I am to worship God, be that happy, sad, tired, disgusted, ticked off? Is it not alright for a Pastor to go to church the same? No, I don’t mean pouring his/my heart and soul to every passer by, but not hiding a rough time either, putting on pretend happiness, is this ministry?

I have had one of the most difficult years of my life this past year, and although some people would hate to have to know that, and most people will pretend they don’t know, is forcing a smile really what people need? When I think of it over the past year, I have had more “ministry moments” because I was real about where I’m at, then I have had in more “cheery times”. I have had numerous people come to me and thank me for being real, that I was a breath of fresh air, in a trend of phoney Christianity. Why shouldn’t this be the way it is in the church? Is it not there, more than anywhere where people need to see that God meets us where we’re at, not necessarily making everything shinny happy smiling, but holding us when times are difficult.

So all of this to say, I’m going to continue being ME. This is all I know how to be really, and trying to be something else just isn’t going to work for me, regardless of how much pressure I feel to fit into the mould. Yeah, there will be those who really want a plastic smiling Pastor’s wife, but I’m afraid they are going to have to keep looking. I won’t give in to the pressure, I will be there for those who really need a fresh dose of how it is. Someone who knows what it’s like to be there and won’t pretend, but is also sure that God is meeting us where we’re at, making all the difference. Jesus certainly didn’t pretend. It’s time, now more than ever, to be real.

The Beautiful Savanna!


Our beautiful niece Savanna in her Christmas duds.

Sunday, December 10, 2006

just another dirty look

So it's true, I was out for coffee with someone this past week, and yet another person mentioned that someone thought I was angry with them because I was giving them dirty looks. Perhaps I am inwardly angry, perhaps they are deeply insecure, but I have to wonder why it is I seem to give off dirty looks, or people seems to percieve dirty looks from me regularly?

Do these same people get dirty looks from everyone? or percieve themselves as recieving dirty looks from everyone? or is it really just me? Do I screw my face up in strange ways when I'm thinking? Do I make faces when I have gas? Do my contacts dry up, bringing on sqwishy eyes? I am intimidating with my strong pressence? Funny how I thought I was generally friendly...what happened?

Did I loose my friendliness? Did I become cold? When did I start giving out dirty looks over smiles? Or is this all just a bunch of crap I should let sift as quickly out of my brain as it came it to it? But what is the common denominator--let us make this about math...

6 days sont disparu!

Ok, so the last day I blogged was 6 days ago, which begs the question, what have I been up to these past 6 days that I couldn't find the time to blog. I always find time for the blog--the blog is my friend...he he. Okay now I'm just being weird.

Well, unfortunatly last monday morning found me sick, but I think I mentioned that last post. Nasty flu bug. Tuesday was a bunch the same, so really I'd say I did absoltuly nothing worth mentioning in those two days.

Wednesday found me working at school, and contemplating another day face first in the toilet bowl--you're welcome for the vivid imagery. But by Wednesday night I was up and about for the finale of The Marriage Course. A good night. A recommended course for sure.

Thursday found me with choir practice and a do nothing morning and afternoon, which I enjoyed emensly, I'm sorry to admit. We're preparing for our Cookies and Carols Christmas Concert next week, which should be a fun time. Then to my absolute horror, even after hurrying home from practice, there was no Grey's Anatomy-which I must admit just doesn't make Thursday nights the same!

So bring on Friday--a full day. I did work the day, which was good, and then came home long enough to throw together my rice for the potluck. Because Chad was out again introducing the Lapointes Christmas concert, we ended up running late for the caroling at the hospital, so we visited with friends of ours who just had their first baby, she is adorable! little Ella! Then we headed off for the rest of the caroling party which ended up at the church for potluck. Good times--oh and Chad went again to introduce the Lapointes second set of concert.

Saturday didn't dawn early-which is absolute bliss for me. I love to sleep in! And after I got up and while Chad was at the church working on the Youth Christmas Play's lights--I cleaned up the house preparing for...THE TREE....

Saturday around 4pm we headed out the Mazoroll Settlement Road to pick and as Chad would say, murder, our very own Christmas tree! It is so exciting! last year was the first year I'd ever gone to a farm and cut my very own tree down and until it becomes too difficult, I say it's a must do! So we found the perfect tree of course! Chad wanted a scrawny one, but I got my way and I must say it is perfect! We got it up and it only fell over once!

So today was church. Which I managed to sneak out of by accident, falling asleep after I dropped Chad off at church this morning. Tonight's Youth play was beyond fabulous--the best I've seen at SSC! And tonight Chad put the lights on the tree, so tomorrow is go to Houlton and pay on teh blasted student loan, and finish decorating the tree--assuming work doesn't call.

So that's my boring life! Advent basket has remained fun though! :)

Thinking Christian

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Monday, December 04, 2006

snow day...dec. FOUR

It was a beautiful snowy day today, unfortunatly the snow arrived only after several hours of vomitting and sick stomach misery for me, around 3am this morning. Gross. I hate being sick. Not that anybody much likes it. I haven't been sick much in the last few years, so I guess I was due. So I spent much of the day sleeping, (of course when I did finally get out of bed Chad met me with today's advent present-- scotch tape for more wrapping ) I watched a little t.v. in my jammies, nursing my upset stomach, then I had a long nap this afternoon and I've been feeling tons better since then.

The snow is so beautiful and the flakes were so fluffy today. I love looking out the window and imagining it is a snowglobe of my neighborhood. If only I could paint. I spent some of my sick afternoon on my living room couch watching our neighbor through the window as he shoveled his driveway and played with his very young little girl in the snow. They looked like they were having so much fun! She was all bundled up, hardly able to walk. She would fill her arms with snow and waddle over to her Dad who would pretend he didn't see her coming. She would walk right up to him until she could touch him and then dump the snow on his legs or boots. He would then jump back looking shocked, and she'd run off gleefully to fill her arms with more snow. Made me want to go out and play too.

Tonight Chad & I got our Christmas cards ready to head out the door. I'm quite pleased with our relative promptness on this one!

Well I'm headed to bed, feeling better and hoping to stay that way. Tomorrow will be better. Happy snow day!

Sunday, December 03, 2006

December THREE!

So it's the third of December already! Hard to believe! Chad woke me at 7:30, as is our custom on Sunday mornings when I don't have to be to choir practice and early service, and I drove him in, but not before he met me in the doorway with today's advent present--stamps to mail our cards!,

Then I came home for a quiet and slower paced morning of getting ready. I must admit I really enjoy that, I hate rushing in the morning, but more than the dislike of rushing is the dislike of getting out of bed! Usually I've been up too long by the time I drive Chad in to work, and I get back home, to go back to bed when I get back home, so today I made myself some toast with raspberry jam, and some tea and watched Coronation Street---I admit it I love the British soaps--I can't help myself, it's a vice. I mean I don't go out of my way to watch it, usually I'm at church, but those mornings when I get the chance, it's one of the things that linger from my non-church days. Anyway, I got myself ready for the second service and went in.

Following service Chad and I came home for a yummy salad with chicken and rasins and sunflower seeds and cheese, I'm telling you it was THE salad!

Evening service approached and tonight was the kids Christmas production. Our SS KIDS Theatre, is a new ministry in our church this fall and Melanie Murray and her crew did a fabulous job tonight! Every Sunday evening, during the regular evening service this group gets together with the kids ages 3 through grade 5 to work on drama, dance and choral--and wow have they been working hard! What a show! Hats off to them!

December TWO!

So Saturday, December two had come and gone. A rather quiet Saturday, as I often like it. I slept till 10am, as is my custom when left to my natural tendencies. Then I got up and Chad & I opened out advent present, really cool decorated Christmas cards, and then I spent the afternoon working on a Christmas project and watching movies, oh right and eating gucamole-yummy yummy. Then Chad & I went outside and tried to take a Christmas photo. I'm laughing right now, because now that I think abou it it was a strange idea. I thought we should take some coloured lights and wrap them around us and take the pic!, so now we've got these Christmas photo's that look like I'm strangling Chad in Christmas lights-the truth comes out. After this we ran out to the Bridges of Canada Christmas dinner. It was really nice. Tons of turkey, tons of people, and great stories about how God has changed the lives of real people.

Friday, December 01, 2006

It's December ONE!

Happy first of December folks, as the icy rain pellets hit the window pane of our cozy mini home my mind wanders back to the days before elnino and elnarmo and elisa...anyway, to the days when December meant snow, white, fluffy, pleasant, warm, sweet on your tongue unless a dog got there first, snow. Will it come? All I've ever wanted for my birthday was snow...and most years I get it-let this year not be the first without! I'm actually really excited about my 27th year. Yup, I've thought since I was seven years old, that 27 would be the year of good things-bring it on.

Until then my lovely Mom has entertained Chad & I with an advent basket. Today was the first day we could open a gift. It was actually quite funny, last night a little past eleven we're lying in bed and I say, you know it's almost the first of december, in little under and hour....and Chad suggests we stay up for midnight to open up our gift, it was just killing us! Common sense kicked in and a desire not to be tardy to work this morning, and we decided if we were still awake at midnight we would get up and open it, otherwise we would wait until morning. At 11:31pm, I still thought we would make it, but we didn't we fell asleep and had it to open this morning.

I thought I did the really polite thing and I told Chad he could open it if he wanted to, this day anyway, I don't know if I'll always be so generous, ok, I know I won't always be so generous. Anyway, we were thrilled to open up chocolate advent calandars, but get this-it was one for each of us, so we don't have to share! I guess my Mom knows us to well and didn't want us fighting so close to the holidays! :) to bed for this sleepy head---advent #2 tomorrow!