Well it’s May 01 and I’m back. Or at least going to try. My amazing little girl finally arrived in November 07 and I am in love. Never have I known love like this. As I rocked her in my arms one night last December I called my Mom and said “Mom, I know you can’t live your life backwards, but if I had known growing up that you loved me like this, like how I love Zoë, I never could have questioned it.”

How I adore her, how my life has changed. I realize now, I had been so concerned I was to selfish to love someone else enough to be a parent, but it’s not that I am no longer selfish, I just suddenly care about someone else’s well being so much more than my own.

I look for her smile first thing in the morning, her laugh is music to my heart, her babblings light up my day. Does everyone love their children as much as I love my Zoë?