I had a lovely dream last night. Have you ever had one that kind of brings things together for you, resolves something for you? I remember my Mom telling me of one she had during a really difficult time in her life. One of her most favorite Aunts came and walked with her in a garden in her dream, assuring her things would be alright. I remember Mom telling me how she drew so much comfort from that dream.
Last night I had something similar happen to me for the first time. I dreamed I was having lunch with Katrina in a beautiful garden, on a gorgeous day. I have deliberatly not written about Katrina on this blog until now, I guess things seemed unresolved for me up until this point, a tender spot, and honestly (although I try to be honest and myself on this blog) I didn't know that I could be honest about my feelings, so I chose to say nothing. I think I'm ready now.
I was telling Katrina, in my dream, that I had never imagined I would see her looking so beautiful and radiant and full of life again (I can't describe in words how wonderful she looked). I was telling her how it bothered me so much that they (the nurses in the hospital)hadn't let me in to see her, to talk with her when she was in isolation. I told her I was glad to at least have the memory of her big smile when Chad showed off my pregnant belly to her in the window of her room.
Then I started to cry and told her how I had really believed she was going to get her healing, from God, through the doctor's or a transplant..that I couldn't believe she was gone, it didn't fit with what I thought God had in store for her. I was sure she was going to get her healing. She stood up from the lunch table, so beautiful and radiant and came over and gave me a huge, tight hug and told me, tears in her eyes "Heidi, I have my healing." and I woke up. It brings tears to my eyes to think of it now, but I feel more at peace. How I wish she had been able to see our baby born. How she loved Chad & I and was so supportive. How full of life she was. And now she is with God, and she has her healing.
1 comment:
I think there were alot of us that had the same thoughts about Trinas healing and were all dumb founded when she passed away. I was saying to a friend of mine that growing up you become accustomed to aunts, uncles, old people dying but noe we are up in that group where our friends, family are passing on and it is awhole different set of feelings. I don't know if that makes sense to you but when Trina died it threw me for a loop. I have known her for almost 30 years back in the days of wine and roses so to speak. We met up again after I began to attend SSC and thought if anyone would have a miracle it would be her. We should have a Trina club and sit a recall call the good times.
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